Today's Question: Would you like to know the precise date of your death?
My first thought would be, "Why not?" It's not as if there's some possibility that I won't die, so there's no surprise there. And I don't think I'll be living for two hundred years or anything, so I already have my death narrowed down to a window of a few decades. The exact date is just narrower still.
But then I think, "Would it matter?" I suppose if I knew that I a lot less time than I thought I did I would have to make a few changes. There'd be a lot more flights to Vegas, certainly. But in the end it just might take the fun out of the whole thing.
So would I like to know the exact date of my death? Nah.
You?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Yeah, But There's Never Anything GOOD On ...
I was at the grocery store the other day. Standing in line to check out (I refuse to use the self-check-out, but that's a rant for another day) I was greeted- as every customer in every check-out lane was greeted- with images of Jay Leno delivering the previous night's monologue, interspersed with commercials for products I've already had the option of purchasing (I'm in the bloody store, aren't I?) and even recipes, so that I know what to do with the products I've chosen.
At the bank I am once again in line, and once again there is a wall of televisions. CNN and Fox News speak and scroll and ALERT! By time I deposit my meager weekend earnings I am at least partially briefed on fluctuations in the Asian stock market, fluctuations in North Atlantic currents (our globe is apparently getting warm), and fluctuations in starlets' skirts. The starlets seem ahead of the game on the warming crisis, though, so I think we can call that a wash.
In the restaurant where I work there are eleven televisions throughout the building- all of them constantly on mute, providing that comforting, ever-present glow. People will bundle their families into the car, come out to a restaurant with other people, and request that the silent television's channel be changed because Survivor is on.
Even at school not an entryway or hallway or communal gathering area of that institution of higher learning goes unadorned with flat-paneled screens. There is, in fact, an over-sized (42"?) television placed on one wall of a long hallway from the entrance- where there's already a TV. This hallway TV, however, is positioned in such a way that it cannot be comfortably viewed in such a small space; it's just too big. Even if it could be comfortably viewed, it's in the middle of the [expletive deleted] hallway! Certainly not the best place for people to stop and watch bit of TV! I can only conclude that the television was placed there "just because." It's not meant to be watched, but we've gone nearly forty feet without a television, so let's just throw one up in the middle of the hallway.
Why do we need all of these TV's? I'm not on a crusade and I'm not pushing for people to start talking to each other when they're in line on some principle of human connectivity. Generally I don't want to talk to people, either, but I don't need a screen to distract me from it. At home I avoid TV with a few exceptions. If someone told me I wasn't allowed to watch TV ever again I'm pretty sure I'd make it. Imagine...
Let's imagine that for a moment: you're not allowed to watch so much as a second of television. Where could you go? Forget everything listed above: major grocery stores, most restaurants/bars, banks, school. And what would your house look like? How in blazes would you know how to arrange the furniture???
As I said, I'm not really on a crusade, just a rant. It's something I've noticed and I wonder, "Why?" We don't need TV's everywhere, so we've probably chosen to put them everywhere. Why did we choose this? Is it the same as popping in my iPod headphones out in public every once in a while?
At the bank I am once again in line, and once again there is a wall of televisions. CNN and Fox News speak and scroll and ALERT! By time I deposit my meager weekend earnings I am at least partially briefed on fluctuations in the Asian stock market, fluctuations in North Atlantic currents (our globe is apparently getting warm), and fluctuations in starlets' skirts. The starlets seem ahead of the game on the warming crisis, though, so I think we can call that a wash.
In the restaurant where I work there are eleven televisions throughout the building- all of them constantly on mute, providing that comforting, ever-present glow. People will bundle their families into the car, come out to a restaurant with other people, and request that the silent television's channel be changed because Survivor is on.
Even at school not an entryway or hallway or communal gathering area of that institution of higher learning goes unadorned with flat-paneled screens. There is, in fact, an over-sized (42"?) television placed on one wall of a long hallway from the entrance- where there's already a TV. This hallway TV, however, is positioned in such a way that it cannot be comfortably viewed in such a small space; it's just too big. Even if it could be comfortably viewed, it's in the middle of the [expletive deleted] hallway! Certainly not the best place for people to stop and watch bit of TV! I can only conclude that the television was placed there "just because." It's not meant to be watched, but we've gone nearly forty feet without a television, so let's just throw one up in the middle of the hallway.
Why do we need all of these TV's? I'm not on a crusade and I'm not pushing for people to start talking to each other when they're in line on some principle of human connectivity. Generally I don't want to talk to people, either, but I don't need a screen to distract me from it. At home I avoid TV with a few exceptions. If someone told me I wasn't allowed to watch TV ever again I'm pretty sure I'd make it. Imagine...
Let's imagine that for a moment: you're not allowed to watch so much as a second of television. Where could you go? Forget everything listed above: major grocery stores, most restaurants/bars, banks, school. And what would your house look like? How in blazes would you know how to arrange the furniture???
As I said, I'm not really on a crusade, just a rant. It's something I've noticed and I wonder, "Why?" We don't need TV's everywhere, so we've probably chosen to put them everywhere. Why did we choose this? Is it the same as popping in my iPod headphones out in public every once in a while?
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Question the Second
If you knew you could devote yourself to any single occupation- music, writing, acting, business, politics, medicine, etc.- and be among the best and most successful in the world at it, what would you choose? If you knew you only had a 10 percent chance of being so successful, would you still put in the effort?
Of the options listed, I'd want to be the best at writing. I like writing, and there's a lot about it that appeals to me- not the least of which is the fact that writing lasts, in one way or another. It's a record that says, "I've been here," or, "I thought this." And when people read it, they carry that little bit around with them. That's right: by reading this, you are making me immortal. Good job. As for what I would do if there were only a 10 percent chance of acheiving worldwide fame- of course I'd put in the effort. Those are better odds than I'd get anywhere else!
Of the options listed, I'd want to be the best at writing. I like writing, and there's a lot about it that appeals to me- not the least of which is the fact that writing lasts, in one way or another. It's a record that says, "I've been here," or, "I thought this." And when people read it, they carry that little bit around with them. That's right: by reading this, you are making me immortal. Good job. As for what I would do if there were only a 10 percent chance of acheiving worldwide fame- of course I'd put in the effort. Those are better odds than I'd get anywhere else!
Monday, November 10, 2008
Question the First
I was taking a look at some other blogs today and saw one in which the writer (blogger? Surely not author ...) posted answers to random questions as either a complete post or part of the post. Seeing this I suddenly remembered that I had a book of questions (indeed, if you believe the title it is, "The Book of Questions") that would be perfect for a small installment in my blog, and maybe it would help jumpstart more activity on my part.
I'm taking it easy on the first question: If you could have free, unlimited service for five years from an extremely good cook, chaffeur, housekeeper, masseuse, or personal secretary, which would it be?
Right away I can knock out housekeeper (who cares?) and personal secretary (not really that busy). Chaffeur is tempting because I hate driving and cars and just about everything that goes along with that. My own personal chaffeur would be pretty sweet. Masseuse is attractive, too, but how many massages can a guy get in five years and still really get into it, you know? I'm going to have to go with good chef, final answer. Extremely good food every night for five years? Sign me up!
What about you? Cook, chaffeur, housekeeper, masseuse, or secretary?
I'm taking it easy on the first question: If you could have free, unlimited service for five years from an extremely good cook, chaffeur, housekeeper, masseuse, or personal secretary, which would it be?
Right away I can knock out housekeeper (who cares?) and personal secretary (not really that busy). Chaffeur is tempting because I hate driving and cars and just about everything that goes along with that. My own personal chaffeur would be pretty sweet. Masseuse is attractive, too, but how many massages can a guy get in five years and still really get into it, you know? I'm going to have to go with good chef, final answer. Extremely good food every night for five years? Sign me up!
What about you? Cook, chaffeur, housekeeper, masseuse, or secretary?
Pyle, England
I am an admitted and unapologetic Anglophile. I'm a complete sucker for a British accent. I watch British comedy, and I even understand and get the jokes sometimes. I've fully incorporated the phrase, "Bloody hell," into my vocabulary and I use is whenever I can. I'm even finding that I'm partial to British authors. Maybe it's the extra "u" they put in their words from time to time. I don't know. But there's definitely a connection.
Perhaps I've found that connection, here. It's a town in what I think is Wales called Pyle. Ah, the fertile green fields that gave birth to my ancestors are calling me home, and the place has got my name written all over it in more ways than one. It might not look like much to some, but those rocky shores, emerald fields, and granite skies draw me in. Maybe one day I'll settle down in that lush countryside, tend to a flock of sheep. Or something.
Whatever the connection, I definitely want to visit this place and check out the area, which I really do think is idyllic. I don't know what it is about England in general, but I must go there one day and see what my minor obsession is really all about.
Perhaps I've found that connection, here. It's a town in what I think is Wales called Pyle. Ah, the fertile green fields that gave birth to my ancestors are calling me home, and the place has got my name written all over it in more ways than one. It might not look like much to some, but those rocky shores, emerald fields, and granite skies draw me in. Maybe one day I'll settle down in that lush countryside, tend to a flock of sheep. Or something.
Whatever the connection, I definitely want to visit this place and check out the area, which I really do think is idyllic. I don't know what it is about England in general, but I must go there one day and see what my minor obsession is really all about.
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